Younger Gamers Don’t Know S*#t

I still get hard looking at this...

I still get hard looking at this…

I am, as you may remember, on holiday. So, I shall try to keep this as brief as possible. I met a young Scottish fellow today named Ethan. Ethan was at first, understandably shocked at the ambiguous revelation that I was in fact a gamer much like he was. It was though, when he began to lay upon my ears, his tales of gaming glory, that I felt a little taken back. Does this kid have any idea how much his stories pale in comparison to any elder gamer’s stories? Does he know the shit I have seen? Whilst tales of taming mighty dragons and stories of defeating Bioshock on its hardest difficulty may at first, in his nubile young mind stand out as legendary in their own status’s, they do as I said above, pale pathetically in comparison to my own, or to anybody from my gaming generation for that matter. Ethan, you are speaking to a man to whom genuinely defeated Tetris whilst being so high on whichever drugs were popular at the time that, at the same time as playing said game, was contemplating heavily whether of not he should stick his cock into his pet parakeet.

The bottom line is. My parakeet died tragically. But most importantly, you should have some respect for your peers, they were your age once and experienced the same thing you are right now!

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